We were dining at Sunny Side (or is it Street?) Cafe for lunch.

Alex was coloring his kids menu with the traditional red, blue, green and yellow crayons.

I noticed that his blue crayon was going to be snapped in half if he continued to draw the way he was.

My words of wisdom:

“Alex, don’t hold your crayon like that. You are going to break it.”

Alex:

“What?”

Me:

“You’re putting too much pressure on the center of that crayon and you are going to snap it like a twig.”

Alex:

“What?”

My Mom:

“Why do you use words like that with him? He has no idea what you are saying.”

Me:

“I don’t know. I never really thought about it.

Alex:

“What?”

Me:

“Nothing buddy. I like your picture.”

I ooh and ahh over our babies. Call them little pet names and adopt their baby talk words as my own. I still say I’m going “nigh-nigh” and I will forever probably say I need to go “potty” while I’m in the presence of grown adults with no children in sight.

But..

When my children start speaking full sentences I start talking to them like they too are my age. Thankfully my swearing is at a minimum, unless you count “crap” and “pissed off”, I say those phrases A LOT.

I will go into lengthy explanations and sometimes I see their eyes glaze over and know that I’ve “lost” them but it’s almost like I have no clue on how to make it simple and easy.

Am I the only one who speaks in “adult” sentences when speaking to their children?

And how many more “quotation” marks can I use in a post?

At least I took a breather on  the “exclamations”, I know I tend to use an over abundance of those little bats and balls (at least that is what Alex thinks they are!!!!!!!!!

Alex and baby dressed in holiday beauty!

Big sisters strike again.

For more Wordless Wednesday visit 5 Minutes for Mom.

After two very similar births I thought the third would be a piece of cake. Have some mild contractions, the ones you talk and laugh through, the kind where your doctor doesn’t even think you are in labor but you surprise them by being four centimeters dilated and get to stay to have a baby. You sit around until you get too uncomfortable, only then asking for the epidural. The numbness sets in rendering you free and relaxed. Then they break your water and a bit later you push a few times and the baby slides out slimy and screaming. As far as my experience had been, giving birth was easy. Heck getting my wisdom teeth out had been much worse!

I was underneath the computer desk with a screwdriver trying to install a new ethernet card. I felt a strange pop within my belly and a slight trickle of liquid leaked from me, like I had peed my pants. Again. I lifted myself up and sure enough the carpet was saturated in one spot. I asked the girls to get me a towel and to get their dad. They didn’t quite understand why I needed the towel, but I told them not to ask questions and just do as I said. I sat on it and Brian trudged up the stairs unhappy after being woken from his nap on the couch.

“What?”

“My water broke!”

“Really?”

His frown instantly changed to a surprised smile.

I was getting ready to leave, chatting on the phone to friends when about twenty minutes later the first contraction hit. I folded over, and thought I was going to die. The pain ripped through my body in a way I had never, ever, felt before. We left with the intention of taking the girls to my parents first. More intense contractions in the car made me reconsider, so my Dad met us at the hospital.

They couldn’t figure out if my water had broken. Twice I had to scoot down. A little more, just a bit more and deal with a speculum during crazy white knuckle grasping the sides of the bed, almost passing out pain. I wait for them to take their little slide under a microscope to figure out if my water did indeed break. I vacillated between venting about having to be in triage to thinking I was going to be ripped in two. I had never felt so much pain in my life and this was my third time around!

“I’m going to die, I’m going to die.”

“Jesus, help me!”

Oh wait, I’m supposed to breathe through contractions. Just remember to breathe.

“I’m dying, I’m dying.”

“Jesus help me, I’m dying!”

The midwife on duty came back to confirm I was telling the truth, my water had in fact broken. I was taken to a room where I got my epidural. Now comfortably numb except for the minor problem of the hot spot in my hip and thigh. I felt everything in that one spot. I didn’t feel like death, but it was no picnic either. Next thing I know it’s go time. A few pushes and out he came with his one little hand up by his head.

Placed upon my chest was my beautiful son. I stared deep into his unique light brown eyes. I was no longer only a mother to girls. Alexander was finally here. This precious baby boy was mine.

Then the whole world shifted.

Written for the prompt over at The Red Dress Club.

“Katie, I am awake.”

“Why do I always have to wear a long sleeve shirt?”

“It’s winter.”

“Brianna doesn’t have to wear a long sleeve shirt!”

“She’s wearing one.”

“That’s not fair Mom!”

“Katie, it’s freezing outside!”

“Where is my sweater? Is it in the dryer?”

“The only thing in the dryer is the couch slip covers. Is Alex awake?”

“Yes.”

“Darn it. Turn my light on please.”

“You need to buy me more sweaters for school. I don’t have any.”

“You have a closet full of sweaters, you just choose not to wear them.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Yes, you do. You have that navy one that was Addy’s. You said it’s too big, but it is just your size. You have three other sweaters!”

“That’s not true.”

“Katie, just look in your closet!”

“Those aren’t school sweaters. I want my pink one.”

“I don’t know what you did with your pink one.”

“I’m changing!”

“No Katie, you completely match. You look nice. Now stop arguing with me and stay still.”

“Ow Mom, you’re pulling my hair!”

“I’m not doing it on purpose, your hair has knots in it.”

“You’re doing it too fast! Ow!”

“You should have just left it in a pony tail, then it wouldn’t have knots!”

“No Mom! It’s your fault Mom!”

“Just stay still. Stop itching it, you’ll mess it up!”

“It’s itching me Mom!”

“It’s done. Don’t touch it. Get your shoes on, go downstairs and get breakfast.”

“I want a bagel.”

“Brianna! Come up here, I need to do your hair!”

“Katie, we don’t have time for a bagel. Get a fruit bar. Stop touching your hair!”

“You always make us eat fruit bars.”

“Fine, we do have time. I’ll make you a bagel. Now go downstairs and get your shoes on.”

“Brianna, Mom said we can have bagels.”

“Mom, Katie said we can have a bagel. Is she lying?”

“I’ll make bagels but we need to hurry.”

“Yes!”

“Come here so I can get your hair done.”

“Ow.”

“Stop moving away! You’re making it harder.”

“That hurts, you brushed my ear! Ow!”

“Stop moving then! You keep pulling away and it makes it harder to get the knots out!”

“I’m not moving, you keep pulling me that way.”

“Sorry.”

“Mom, my tooth is really wiggly today.”

“Great. Okay done. Go downstairs. Did you put your lunch in your backpack?”

“Yeah.”

“What about Katie’s?”

“Yeah.”

“Good.”

“Alex come upstairs!”

“What Mom?”

“Come upstairs!”

“What Mom?”

“Alex, come upstairs.”

“Hi Mom.”

“Hi Alex. Did Daddy change your diaper?”

“No.”

“Come here. You need to get dressed. We need to go to the store to buy Mommy some medicine.”

“Go store buy medicine?”

“Yes. Just pee, no poop!”

“Just pee!”

“How about your Eagles shirt.”

“Eagles!”

“Okay, pants. Socks. I smell your stinky feet!”

“Stinky feet!”

“Wait, shoes on.”

“I do it.”

“No buddy, Mommy do it. We need to hurry. Get sisters to school. Okay all done. Go downstairs.”

“I have bagel?”

“Yes, but lets go. Come on now.”

“You’re only getting half a bagel girls.”

“I have bagel now?”

“It’s got to cook buddy.”

“I have it now Mom?”

“It needs to go in the toaster.”

“I have it now Mom?”

“Fine.”

“Girls, do you have water bottles?”

“Yeah, I’ll fill it up at school.”

“Mom, Brianna never helps me. She’s always mean to me.”

“That’s not true, she’s just saying that to get me in trouble!”

“Stop girls. Eat your bagel. We got to go. First let me pee.”

“Brianna, you’re a mean girl.”

“Stop Katie.”

“Girls! Get your coats on and get in the van!”

“I go in the van too Mom?”

“Yes Alex.

“It’s cold!”

“I know buddy.”

“Stop kicking, Katie!”

“Katie stop kicking Brianna’s seat!”

“Brianna’s being annoying!”

“Mom, I’m just sitting here!”

“I have a drink Mommy?”

“Girls stop! Geez, enough already! Alex, your cup is at home.”

“Can you put Justin Bieber on?”

“It’s not in the van Katie.”

“Taylor Swift?”

“Nope.”

“Brianna, look at this.”

“Brianna, look at this!”

“Look Bra-nah.”

“Brianna!”

“Mom, Brianna isn’t looking!”

“Brianna just look at your sister! Stop ignoring her!”

“I can’t turn around!”

“Then just say that instead of ignoring her!”

“Fine, I’m looking Katie! What!”

“Remember when. Remember when. Remember when we got these shells. From that place. That place with the water, but the water was gone. That place was fun.”

“Girls, bus! Wait, let me pull up closer.”

“Bye Mom! Bye Alex”

“Bye Mom!”

“Bye girls. Be good. Have a good day at school.”

“School bus!”

“Yep buddy.”

“I go to school?”

“Next year you can go to school! Like a big boy!”

“I go on bus?”

“No buddy, not until you’re older.”

“Okay Mommy.”

“Let’s go to the store. We got to hurry though. Emily will be here soon.”

“I play with Emily?”

“Yep.”

“I like Emily.”

“I need Starbucks.”

“What Mommy?”

“I said I need Starbucks.”

“What?”

“Never mind.”

I started writing this for another post to share a bit of the craziness of getting the kids ready in the morning. I realized I was writing so much dialogue that it was just perfect for this prompt!

-Hemingway was famous for his super sparse writing. He used almost only dialogue in many of his works. Write a piece in which you use ONLY dialogue. Then link up Friday.